You leave me SPEECHLESS.,

I have no idea ..why would I be doing the same mistakes again and again..Where is the courage and inspiration coming from? I've got no idea.. Really confused.. Today, I skipped work. Stayed at home doing my RP with my two classmates, Kar chee and Woon See. We did run off from our RP and chat and play around with Facebook. That's no doubt. Kar Chee asked "him" to take the photostated RP of yong seah-another classmate's to my house. Honestly speaking.. I've got 2 mixtures of different feelings at the same time. Curious yet, uneasy. Weirdo me. After all... I saw his Msn Shoutout.. I really wanted to ask and confront him to get an answer. Yet, I've never got the guts to. Till justnow..
I've no idea where the bravery came from. I texted him via msn " actually i got something to ask you" He didnt respond and I texted again and said " It's ok. Nothing already" Im going insane. Im clear cut that he's not my cup o f tea. But, why do I have starnge feelings? Why? I dont want all this!!! Yet, He didnt take any initiatives nor actions if he is really repent of the things he did.

" Falling in love with you, is my fault"

" Rejecting you, is my wrong"

"Huring you,is Im bad"

" You hate me, is understandable"

Everything is done..

If I just simply can act like nothing has happen..

Then Nobody will know it...

The holiday is going to end

I've just dont want to go back to the school..

To face all this reality..

If I say Im ok..

Sorry, Im telling you a fake answer..

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

2:33 AM

Wednesday,

June 16 2010...

A memorable day..

For us all...

So-called 1st gathering for some of us..

A total of 10 Ex- convent Students..

All Glowing bright...

Some went for form 6, some went for colleges..

And some even when after working lives..

And, here we are...

All gather , safe and sound...

Gathered at Autocity- Ice Ice Baby..

It's really a memorable day..

Once lost..

Now found..

Once strange

Second close...

That all tie us together..

Is the closeness of bonds that is built in the word...

"Frenship"

The virtues..

This is a treasure...

That all of us shall treasure...

Nobody knows...

When is the next gathering will be..

Tomorrow? Tonight?

Next week??

Or even ,,,next year??

Nobody knows...

We shall put all those moments into memories

"Pictures are not captured for a beautiful tool...It's captured as a permanent memory"

To those...

Going for training...

Going tor new study life..

Going for new working life..

I hereby,wish you all..

"All The BEst"

It's as simple as that...

But, remember...

No matter where you are...

We shall be united and that's where we shall stand on^^

Muacks..Hearts u guys..

* YPSTTL* Our Past Initial Trio

* The Gang *

* Owner and her "play play" dadi *

*pretty Lads*

*Together We are United*

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

2:20 AM

Yesterday my dad's birthday celebration was held in one of the restaurant in Chai Leng Park..

The food there was ok only...

There were about 8 of us...

I've got not so much of pictures to show up..

Below are some...

The cake..~taste not bad~

~different types of durian..Ah Tan's present for my dad~

Lastly,the owner herself..^^
~The dress for the night~

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

8:18 PM

I've got no idea ..

Why and how..

This can happen to me...

The feeling of lost...

The feeling of disappointed...

The feeling of drowsiness..

Suddenly, everything comes by...

It felt so empty and lonely..

Yet, so familiar and quiet..

I've got no idea..

How and when..

There's a spark of light...

Right in front of me..

There's a sweet yet, mystery voice...

Called upon me..

As thought,there's someone waiting for me..

Or,is it my illusion??

Or, Am I just dreaming?

I closed my eyes..

And,

Listened to my own heartbeats...

Its pumping very fast...

Really fast...

Everytime I heard the voice..

It's calling me again..

I felt it..

The feeling of warmth..

The feeling of closeness...

Yet, so far...

I opened my eyes...

In blurriness..

I saw a pair of hands..

Flawless, smooth pair of hands..

Held out to me..

As if calling for me to wakeup..

Yes..I heard it...

It's calling my name..

I can see the lights again..

It's very bright..

Slowly, I held my hand towards "it"

With a gush...

"It" pushed me out...

Yes..

Im out of the darkness..

Im no longer lonely..

Thanks to my Angel..

My mother..

*love u..for always being there for me..*

*even for the next generation..I wish Im always Your daughter*

*thanks*

*i know u're not going to see this*

*but,this is a poem..im writing for you*

*love u forever*

*more than anything else*

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

1:37 AM

Today's my Daddy's big day..

Should I wish him??

Yeah..It's weird...

I know..

But, What can I say...

Everyone has his/her own weakness in her/his glory life..

So..same goes to me...

I have to0...

*sigh*

To do or not to do?

MR.William Shakespeare once quoted..

Nah...

As if Im a poetry girl..

Anyway..

Am going to have dinner with my family tonite..

For HIs bdae...*smiles*

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

1:07 AM

this movie really made me cried a lot...T___T
u guys should watch it if you havent...
*thumbs up*
Xia Yi Zhan De Xing Fu
Autumn's Concerto

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

9:00 AM

I just logged on to facebook justnow..
I saw someone's status updated...
I should have congratulate him..
But, somehow..I got no idea why my heart ache...
I've got no idea whether is it because of the movie I am watching...
Or was it something else....
Its been some time since Me and Him being "strangers"
not even frenz, nor simple classmates...
We seemed much more like ignorant to each other...
avoiding each other most of the time...
He's status has already been updated into " in a relationship and it's complicated"
Should I go and congratulate him? or should I ignore it???
Why do I felt so...so...~
I just dont want this feelings...
Go away..
Leave me alone!!
I've got no idea why....
I texted my fren,SM...
Wanted to talk to her...
But,her hp got no credits....
*sighs*
Am I so stupid??
I wanna let go of this feeling...
The feeling of being weirdo and akward...
*sobs*
Contineu my movie...
It's a sad,romantic love story...
It made me cried a few times...
YEt, its good for me to release thou...
"Autumn's Concerto"

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

6:01 AM

Uploaded my

♥ Momo ♥ Darling's QQ pics...

His "hair" was long at that time...

Caused him hurt his eyes...

Pity him nia..*weeps*

Then ,sis suggested me to sacrifise my hair clips for him...

So I did..^^

Momo tried very hard to get it off..XD

But, its way to0 strong for him...

*giggles*

So, here are the photos...

Anyway, he has his hair cut already...

His eyes.. are really big^^

Adores him....

♥ Momo ♥ The Lil bro of ✖ Cuppy ✖

Lastly, the owner herself....

♥✖♀ღ Elaine ღ♂✖♥

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

4:42 AM

The 1st week of my holidae.. I've skipped my PP class...

I went to KL wit my mum n sis n also her fren..

He's also my mummy's staff worker..

I had a great fun wit them...

*hearts them*

overnite at my aunt's house...

Aunt and Uncle brought us to had our so-called supper...

Aunt called crabs for me...

And we shared..

*fully full*

That's where I had my first love for breads...

But,its fried bread^^

the next morning..

after dropped by at Joess jie jie shop...

My mummy's franchisor..

We seeked for shop for pedicure^^

And 3 of us...

did pedicure..

Its my 1st time

At first felt weird and akward ..

being treated by others

due to rushing of time...

she hurted my toes..

*weeps*

at night..

we drove up to GENTING to meet up wit uncle and auntie

checked in..

and then we separated ways..

me and sis and her fren,Steve gor

went to play...

haha...

had great fun...

Steve even helped me to earn a DINO back^^

then 3 of us'splay rounds..and exchanged a small DINO baby...

I guess..we spent around rm100++ for playing

then we had supper at MCD...

and me and sis "ta pao" KFC for mummy

when mummy came

she told us a bad news regarding our relative..

then at early midnite..

we drove back..

we didnt even slept in the hotel room...*sigh*

the ROOM was extremely big!!!!

can fit 10 person...

that nite was only for aunt and uncle..

bad news..

anyway...

i've got to pen down...

Will upload pictures when I got them out^^

LOved,

ELaine

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

1:30 AM

After all this while....

I reali thnk that I've been in the wrong class...

or perhaps school...

I've got accepted and rejected at the same time...

Boys or girls..

Its still the same...

Being human being after all..

with 2 eyes, 1 mouth and most of all "feelings"

How cum...

Some can unhesitantly hurt you wit heart...

Some unexpectedly show you with angers with no reasons...

Some even worst...

Plunk through our hearts with love yet... they are the ones cut our heart apart...

And those quietly... stares at you wit hopes...

that you might wan to know them...

Im serious about being caring and friendly towards all of them

yet... sadly..

I ended up being hurt and at the same time hurting people...

After all...

Being caring..is it a crime???

Its always been there in me...

Should I abandon the virtues of being caring??

Let me know!!!

I hate those that hurts me!!!

Yet, I hate myself for hurting them...

Its not like me being myself after all!!!

Luckily its already holiday..

Or else...

I gotta shed my face from them...

I wanna hide myself!!

Get them out of my mind!!

Rip them apart...

As if...

I can....

*cross my fingers*

Just crapping at here...

Wanna go to have my lunch already...

Btw..today is Teacher's day celebration..had fun wit classmates thou

Today is the end of our mid year exam

Starts of our sem break...

End of me being caring and sms-ing so much

Starts of me being phobia of guys...

Again!!!

So long

pen down...

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

10:38 PM